Hello

Oh hey, look who's back. It's been a while, but I thought it'd be nice to come back. Kinda like breakup sex, or make makeup sex, either one. Anyway, I've been doing a bit of thinking (as in...thinking right now as I make this article...), the kind that comes in minuscule amounts (my favorite kind!). It's bad for you to think too much. But, what is it about the past that we agonize over? I know it's a cliche, and people like avoiding cliches, so I'm not being cliche by being cliche, so it's all good. But, the past contains everything we don't want it to, and as human beings, we are forced by our insidiously nasty nature to constantly ponder about our wouldas, couldas, and shouldas.

People will say that there's no point in remember the past, but I still think it's a good idea to remember how old your kids are, if you have any. That's the funny thing about the past, there are good things (memories) and bad things (memories/STDs/bitchy-exes)). But sometimes those good things are bad, and those bad things are good (funny ol' world isn't it?).

Sometimes those good memories do nothing but taunt you. They wag their happy little asses at you as you sit there staying dumbfounded at how happy their asses are. You wish you too, could you happily wag your happy ass at miserable suckers like yourself. You wish you could revisit those moments, relive them. Maybe, if your a lucky bastard, those memories will give you strength, instead of suck it out of you, like a Delilah (thank you 30 Rock). But shame that they often don't. And then, there are those bad moments, like when you got that STD, or when you lost something very important, or you did something stupid becuase you were a stupid bitch. Now, maybe you'll learn a thing or two. That counts as a good thing right?

-digitaldelay

I Shouldn't Have Said That

There's a little thing that half of the time pisses me off, and the other half of the time I think it's fairly appropriate. That thing, is, being politically correct. A good number of the time, it is perfectly wonderful. Being offensive to other races, genders, and different kinds of sexuality are acts that should not be swept aside so easily. The part I hate however, is when you by no means mean anything offensive at all, and are fairly oblivious at the moment the words leave your mouth, of what others would perceive of what you're saying, and yet people still take offense to it and refuse to turn the other cheek. That pisses me off.

It's a funny thing, it seems to be fairly relative.

"Hey, are you Chinese?"...(no, I'm Vietnamese dipsh*t...)

"Hey, are you white?"...(well, I'm Canadien...)

"Hey, are you Australian?"...(no, I'm from New Zealand dumbass...)

[in a bout of curiosity/fear,in the nicest, most non-offensive tone musterable] "Hey, what ethnicity are you or your parents, or something...? "Uhhh...what do you think I am?" (the f*ck am I supposed to know b*tch?...)

-{[(Honestly, I'm not sure what term to use sometimes to describe people. White, well, maybe Caucasian is more appropriate. Black, well, maybe African-American is better. Wait, if they're..."black", but aren't American? What the f*ck...I've never heard African-English, or African-French.)]}-

In actuality....that could really happen. The second part I hate about that, is that honestly, I was almost going to put in an example of perhaps blacks or Latinos. Then again, I thought about the kind of backlash I'd receive. Then, now I just realized that because I just said that, I'm going to receive backlash anyway. Oh well, f*ck you political correctness.

Yet, I meant absolutely no harm. I try utmost, as a human being, and as one living in our current time, to not be discriminative to anyone. But really, we all are. It's going to take a long time, probably never (for a more cynical view of things...) to get rid of the stereotypes. The only thing we can do, is to try and move past of our brain's hard wiring, and try to see things in the most logical, realistic, and unbiased manner we could possible get out of the shitty minds we have.

But in no ways do I condone the use of derogatory terms either. If someone uses words like "n*gger", "chink". "dyke", etc., etc., then by all means, f*ck them up.

But this extends beyond racial, sexual orientation, or gender matters. Look what I now have to say because of my statement "by all means, f*ck them up". I now have to say that by no means do I condone the brutal, cruel, unreasonable, and physical harming of any fellow souls. Well hell, I didn't even really mean anything bad in the first place. The statement was not serious in the matter that STD's, or babies being hit by cars would be. I mean, the matter and subject itself are serious, but my stupid statement wasn't.

Funny thing too, is amidst all this being nice to everyone when you're already trying to be nice, is that while people are trying to be so correct about this, there's something else that seems to be everywhere. I, we, live in a time where I can't watch t.v. without seeing someone stripping half-naked about to get horny (not politically correct-enough?...how about, getting ready to make additions to our already large population?) with someone else who's also stripping half-naked and about to get...ready. We live in a time where I probably wouldn't really want to watch a movie within 500 ft. of my mom or she might happen upon me watching a sex scene I never intended to watch in movie I heard was really good, and therefore won a few awards. Now look what I have to go on and say...

first of all...not porn...just...no

secondly...( heaves big sighs....) I do not hold anything against the fact that people (enjoy...some...at least do) copulate. It's a fact of life, and it is becoming more and more acceptable in our society. Well, that's fine, your beliefs are your beliefs, just ummm....well....I'll put this as..delicately as possible....don't do anything "stupid".

You know, being inoffensive is good. Being too sensitive about some comments is bad too sometimes.

I just hate how everything is always "not too much of this, not too much of that".

I'm just a bit tired of things.

That, or a bit crazy, loony, cynical, and just plain bored.

-digital delay

What About What?

Sometimes we live for ourselves. We indulge in ourselves. We love to talk about ourselves. Why? No matter how much we think we may hate ourselves, our own self is probably the most important thing to us, in more ways than one.

For example, let’s say two people are drinking orange juice, which just happens to be from Costco, and it also happened to come alone and not in any combined packages. As both finish drinking, they realize a momentous dilemma is upon them. Who shall return the carton of O.J. to the fridge, which so happens to be a few steps away? For the next few minutes, or moments, the two argue ceaselessly, when in that time they could have had some more orange juice, returned the carton, and then learned how to play the theremin. One argues that ‘the one who takes it out’ puts it back, while the other says that ‘the last one to use it puts it back’. Well, it soon becomes resolved. Then the next day the same thing happens, except they each use the other excuse to fit their situation.

So there really was no rule there, neither of them just wanted to put it back…

Often times, even when we think we are doing something for the better of other’s, there’s a good chance we’re doing a big part of it for ourselves.

For another oddly surreal example, I’ll throw in the moon and the sun into one big cluster----k. Maybe the sun thinks the moon doesn’t like it, and vice versa, so they soon become terribly terrified the other will one day decide to try and kill it if they meet. So, they spend their whole lives running away from each other, or is it chasing each other...

Well, while they might think they’re doing a good thing by avoiding any interstellar conflict, they really could just be scared for themselves. To be honest, if I was one, I’d be scared of ramming into some giant rock/molten fireball.

Although scientifically, actually logically (or actually common sense would be better…), none of any of that would be even remotely possible.

So what’s the right thing? The thing we think is right? The thing we think is right that’s affected by those around us? The thing other people think is right but we don’t actually know since we’ve never been told?

I don’t know… f--- you.

-digitaldelay

Scrubbing for my Dollar

To start off the month of May, I’ll write a little something about ‘greed’.

Being my bored self, I took a look at my aunt’s bookshelf, and I spotted an odd looking book, titled “DUH! The Stupid History of the Human Race”. (hmm, maybe that’s true…). I flipped to a random page in the book, which led me to “Chapter 14: Dumb Things Famous People Said.” Wow…really, really interesting…is it?

Actually, it is. Coincidentally, this quote was on the page:

“I think greed is healthy. You can be greedy and still feel good about yourself.”
-Ivan Boesky, financier

I laughed to myself when I read that. In some ways, that’s true—because when you’re greedy, it’s always about yourself. Moments where you feel greedy are the moments where you feel selfish. Don’t take me wrong—you might not be a selfish person, but everyone has their own selfish moments, right?

I can’t even recall the countless moments where I’ve felt greedy. Ranging from video games to books to music, I’ve always dreamed of getting everything. I mean, if you have an amount of wealth equal to that of Bill Gates, you could just point to something you want and you’ll get it! How GREAT is that?

But then again, would you have the same feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment when you buy the item? When you work extremely hard for your money, and you actually start spending it on something, you feel good when you get it, because you know you earned it really well. I mean, you also ‘earned’ the bunches of money you have (when you’re wealthy), but when you earn less, everything you buy will seem so much more valuable. Instead of saying “Oh, wow, the newest Guitar Hero is being released tomorrow. I’ll just go tell my chauffeur to drive me there tomorrow and get it,” it’d be much more satisfying in the end if you said, “Oh, the newest Guitar Hero is being released tomorrow. Let me work hard to earn the amount of money, and then I’ll go buy it!” That way, while you’re playing the game, you’ll have a warm feeling on the inside that you worked your butt off to get this time to play.

Dang! That was a long, random ramble. I’m just sittin’ here at my aunt’s computer in San Diego typing some random article because of this random spark of inspiration from this random book I found on her random bookshelf. Yeah…random.

-the clam.

Airbag

Ahh.....Monday Monday Monday
That dreaded day, it just never stops coming now does it?

Every week, we see it coming. Every week, we just wish it never came. Sadly, every time, there's never much we can do. The day you know you have to go back to that place, whether it be work, school, or anything else. That stifling place, the one that suffocates your very brains. Whatever that place is, it tires you to just be there. You'd rather sit at home and honestly do absolutely nothing, just plain relax, and finally listen to OK Computer in its entirety. The very environment at the place is poison. It's not exactly the people(ok, maybe sometimes), or even the work(probably not true). It's a place you wish you weren't at. You feel bogged down, drowsy, and sick of the feeling you get when you're there. The malaise you experience there can't be eased once you get home. It carries over to the very place of sanctuary in your life.

That's how society is these days. Adults stuck in dead-end jobs, with little to no excitement in their lives. Whining kids are stuck in school, no wonder they're a bother. School's such a despondent place to be at. It's almost like prison come to think about. You can't get out until allowed, you have to what you're told, hopes are stomped on, and reality is shoved up your ***.
Not that I'm saying school's bad, or the people, staff, or students are either. Education's important, the once again, its the environment. You don't even really want to be yourself. Sure, it can be safe, full of learning (supposedly), but that doesn't actually bring kids peace of mind(except knowing you, hopefully, won't get shot there or something). Few things today are truly full of contentment. Perhaps the joy of a young child, and some others I can no longer bring into memory.

The only way you can escape any of that is if you're famous or something. Then again, with the bonds of responsibility in a conventional manner broken, a new set are bound upon you. You have to be a good role model, continue your success, or you'll lose it all. That's serious pressure right there. Just look at how many celebrities crack and break these days. Can't tell which is better, probably neither. The questions is, is there anything better than all that?

Sometimes you just need an airbag to fall right into. A giant pillow to jump off a cliff into, just to release yourself from the chains of everything else. You can't do this all the time, though. If you let yourself go too much, you'll end up doing stupid stuff. You start talking too much, you say the wrong thing. Maybe you end up saying nothing at all when you should have. You let down others and yourself all the time. Yet, you just can't bring yourself to say sorry. No, you're not a jerk or anything(maybe), but you can't bring yourself to say something.

The only thing you can end up doing, is something I would know nothing of. Everyone has their own ideals, dreams, leisures. The best you can do is try and follow them, while being realistic and reasonable. You still have to let go every now and then, though. Sounds impossible doesn't it? Well, it's not, and if it is, who cares. Just be gregarious(depends on yourself) and joyful.

What are you willing to do (for a Klondike Bar) to stop Mondays?

bass(better than Only in Dreams?), the tremolo arm (sustainer?), utter genius, and some weird noises the

on the subject of(absolute, mind blowing, magic) tremolo arms

your laugh of the day !!!!
maybe another ???