Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Warning: Not for Cavity-Conscious People


Alright. Because I feel a bit hysterical at the moment, I'll veer off from the month's theme. This is probably the longest gap in between the previous article and a new one (DD's article wayyy back on April Fool's).

Okay. Let's get to the point. Who doesn't love (except for cavity-conscious people):

CANDY!!

In fact, I'm chewing on a very delectable piece of Milk Dud. Yummy...nysh caramel shenter with uh thin layer of shocolate. –swallows- Excuse me. That small caramel sticky-bomb can get extremely sticky to your teeth. It barely allows you to even talk. Kinda' like peanut butter.

It's good to have candy once in a while (emphasis on once in a while). I don't want to be blamed for the five cavities you're about to have just by reading this article.

Ooh, how about Whoppers? A crunchy center with a nice, layer of milk chocolate on the outside. Not as cavity-dangerous, and much faster to consume than a Milk Dud. I find it funny how they come in giant, quart-sized milk cartons.

Both of the candies mentioned above are manufactured by Hershey's. I love Hershey's. Their milk chocolate bars and white chocolate bars are really sweet...and yummy. Haha, I consider everything yummy. I become untrollably hyper after eating a Hershey's bar.

What other chocolate bars are there? OH! Crunch is also good. Those pesky small little rice crispies all scattered within the chocolate. The Three Musketeers, Milky Way, and Heath Bars. De.lic.ious!

"Baby Bottle Pop, Baby Bottle Pop! You can lick it, shake it, and dunk it!" I know that sounds a bit...weird. But that was the 'in' candy back then. Past popular candies also include Fruit Roll-Ups, Fruit Gushers, Fruit by the Foot, and Ring Pops. Hey—that doesn't mean you should go propose to your girlfriend with that. She'll slap you in the face (or laugh like a maniac...and then slap you in the face).

Or, if you'd like a more fiery taste, try Hot Tamales. They'll give you a nice sting. Don't eat too much though...you'll be crying.

You know what, I'm really lazy right now. I'll just throw a bunch of names out there. Hershey's Kisses, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Kit Kat, Almond Joy, Snickers, Skittles (three cheers for Skittles!), Take Five, Sour Patch Kids, Twizzlers, Jolly Ranchers...they're all so sweet and perfect –mouth waters-.

Hungry for candy? Just be careful...think of your poor teeth.

-the clam.



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3 comments:

digital delay said...

you forgot..the best..twix!

we all love candy..:)..i hope

mourning.glory said...

i love twix! i also love skittles and crunch was my favorite when i was small...er? ish? hey! i happen to think that a ring pop proposal is very sweet. Both literally and figuratively. well, it would be cuter if a little kid did that. but i wouldn't slap somebody for giving me a ring pop. gah this commet is too long, probably because I am hyped up on chocolate.

Anonymous said...

OMG u forgot GODIVA chocolate...and FERRO ROCHER!!! classics...and TRUE divine chocolate...DUH come on now...;)