Sweetness Follows

Is it possible to be so afraid of being paranoid that you become that very fear? The mere thought of something affects the outcome of something else, maybe ironically. The brain is everywhere at once, and yet it's going nowhere at the same time.

Oddly enough, or ironically, or maybe not oddly at all, opposites sometimes go hand in hand. Sweetness can follow bitterness, or vice-versa. Paranoia can be followed by a sense of calming, or the other way around, the calm before the storm. Innovation travels with waste, darkness marches with light, understanding lurks behind confusion.

Another, slight, oxymoron is ignorant bliss. Most people would associate ignorance as a bad thing. Almost arrogant, it’s as if you blindly walk wit your eyes closed ahead into a well lit area. Yet, bliss, is generally a good thing. It’s being happy, content, satisfied. How can two such contradictory things go together? All at the same time, it makes complete sense. If your completely ignorant, you don’t really give a @#$% about anything at all, so how could you be unhappy? You see things the way you want to see things, so you’re happy, but still foolishly, but you’re happy. But is it worth it? Is closing your mind off to reason really worth achieving something so unobtainable? How can you consider it being happy if you’re in that state so foolishly? Or is happy just happy? Maybe the impossible thing to do, is the only thing to do. A balance, not perfect, but enough of one, of both.

While two emotions messing things up together, a much more potent potion could quite possibly be one alone. A dumb, but to the point metaphor could be, would you rather have two two dollar bills, or one five dollar bill? I don’t know about you people, but I much rather see one thing that just brings a smile to your face, every time, instead of seeing two things that just cheer you up a bit. Those kinds of things seem to be missing in the world all too often. It’s like that song, “it’s the only thing that there’s just, too little of…”…or however that thing went. Just that thing that gets you every time…

When your head starts to spin, you start to hear everything around you, albeit in distorted bursts of noise, and yet while you sit there with your head boiling, you feel completely stoned at the same time. Almost as if you’re sick, and your head just starts to feel dizzy and you stagger around helplessly. You have no idea of what to do. So all you do, is sit there.

Perhaps all those feelings mixed together, all the contradicting thoughts, could that be bipolar? Does all this craziness mean you manic-depressive? Or are these emotions just impossible to describe? I’m probably just doing a cruddy job, but they seem like things where you don’t describe, you just let it pass. You let it pass just as you let the rest of the world pass before your eyes, as you sit there, staring blankly, at nothing of vague interest at all.


-digital delay