What to do… what to do…
Too often, it seems like I don’t know what to do. I could easily make a list of one hundred different things I could be doing. Yet here I am, imagining that I’m talking to someone who cares, when I’m really talking to myself, who doesn’t really care.
Apparently, no obviously, I have no direction in my life at the moment, not even as far as a few days, hours, and maybe minutes. It’s a sad thought, when life is all hazy. You don’t know what to do when you’re you just feel trapped and intoxicated. The world seems to whiz right by you. Ha, sounds a lot like I’m high doesn’t it?
Those are the times you waste, the times you burn your life down. The times when you could get off your sorry ass and do that something useful are the times when you should get off your sorry ass and do something useful. We all wait for that one thing, anything really. As long as that thing gives us something to look forward to, something to strive for, we wait for it. We whine and bi***, but it’s so hard to really try and accomplish it, to make it true. Stop playing Guitar Hero and start playing a real guitar. Stop sitting in your room playing your guitar and do something with it. Stop lip-syncing(for those who care, I can't stop watching 2:00 - 3:00) and start singing. Stop singing to yourself and sing to others. Stop dreaming and get that persons number. You can make up the rest for yourself, a unique list that fits only on you.
I hate to sound like a nihilist(I am not a nihilist, however), but what’s the point? You’ll never get good at it, you’ll never actually do that, that will never happen, they’d never go out with you, etc. It seems like negativity is instilled into our brains. The parameters of convention are forced upon you, and there you sit, waiting and dreaming of what could, or perhaps should, have been. Imagine if you didn’t just sit here. Well, dream that you weren’t, that you were out there doing something. Imagine the possibilities; life could be so much more. To some like me, it's a sad and scary thought that we ourselves can( not necessarily will) do a whole mess of crap for ourselves.
Even with all that happening around us, we still need time to ourselves. Times we want to be alone with out thoughts. Times to think, plan out, dream, imagine, and wonder. Extroverts and introverts aren't people who talk a lot, or don't talk at all. Introverts can talk as much, or more, then extroverts. They just need to left alone every now and then, maybe a lot. It doesn't mean they don't enjoy being around people (at least most people).
just wanted to get that out.
i just keep writing the same thing, just with different words
i'm a ******* hypocrite
"what a jerk that dude (me) is!"